Nothing Says ‘I Missed You’ Like a Long Hug
Yes, I am a hugger. Throughout my years of research and experience, I have identified the perfect duration of a friendly hug. Thirteen seconds! Now that might seem a little long for you, but embracing for that length that time moves past the personal walls we build up and touches on that inner psyche. It’s also a closeness that allows us to share a little body odor and maybe share the punchline to a joke, if you want to keep your inner thoughts hidden.
Now you may have to work yourself up to the full thirteen seconds. Hugging someone for that long could seem awkward. Work on your routine. People always love compliments. Consider the lean in for a long sniff of their hair and ask ‘What kind of conditioner do you use? It’s amazing’. Maybe you are close enough with that acquaintance that after a few seconds you can give them a subtle peck on the neck. It doesn’t have to be a big sloppy kiss, just something simple to let your friend know that you really care. Mix up your hugging strategies and find what works for you and your recipients.
There might be the odd squirmer during the hug. You know these people already, so just make sure when you go in for the perfect hug you make sure they too are prepared too hug you back. To approach someone that still has those limbs pinned to their sides allows the hugee to break your grip with a simple shrug. A friend that raises their arms is committed, and there really is no way out. Thirteen seconds…stick it out people.
Watch the big UFC bouts tomorrow. Sure those guys in the ring are fighting for titles, but what is a ‘featherweight’ bout. My guess is there will be a lot of close proximity grappling, maybe some skin on skin contact, and certainly a bit of nuzzling. These guys might be demonstrating their fighting prowess in front of a huge audience, but ultimately they are demonstrating the essentials behind a loving long hug. Maybe you need another beer to really let that sink in.
So the next time you’re saying ‘hello’, don’t just offer a handshake…go in for the hug. With a little practice, you too can pull off the full and magical 13 seconds of bliss.